I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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