used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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