a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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