just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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