K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
After last night, I could never be a politician.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
