We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
