Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I am midnight drunk by noon
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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