i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You ruined the universe
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
