The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
