Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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