how hairy? two words: wookie tits
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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