Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
