Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
