4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
