i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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