My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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