It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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