I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
