This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
