Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
