She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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