My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
