All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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