you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
