oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
