im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize