Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
