WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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