How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize