Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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