too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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