remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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