apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The air was thick with penises
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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