Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
