i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
