you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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