the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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