I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
