if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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