My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
