you turned your livingroom into a bong?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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