I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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