Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
My bed smells like the plague
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
