the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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