That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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