they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
