Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
