I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
