Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize