is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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